Everybody read yesterday’s blog? If you didn’t read the blog yesterday, go here to read it first. It seems like it pissed off a bunch of whiney Democrats. Today, I am responding to one of the nasty emails I got. It is from Democrat R.F., who got so upset, he nearly brought himself to use the FUCK word.

RF writes “She probably Could Not Find A Position….Because she was trying to figure out how to get your teeny weeny Republican dick in….maybe you were aiming for her navel….Republicans have a way of conducting serious business in the wrong friggin place.”

Ok, well in the first place asshole, it’s no secret that I am hung like a titmouse. It’s no great big hairy deal. My wife says she likes it just fine the way it is and that is is bigger than my brother’s anyway.  In the second place, not that it is any of your business, I was aiming for her navel. Being “short-staffed” as I am, I have to aim higher than my actually goal. Aiming for her navel landed me right in her pussy, whereas aiming for her pussy would have just resulted in a dime-sized bruise on her thigh….not that it is any of your business.In the third place, I am not a Republican, I am a Confederate! It pisses me off to think how people like you, with your high-falootin’ attitutdes and all your pretty teeth, think you know how people like me think and who we are. So I think it is time to set the record straight….so here is a little about me. For the record, I do live in the South. I like to take pictures. I have a family like everybody else.

Here is a picture we took at Sears when I was in the 8th grade, before my daughter’s little brother was born.

Amp in Hickory Knob Mall 1978

And I also take art photographs. Here is a “still life” I took out in the back yard the other day.

Amp’s back yard

So, RF ole’ buddy, I hope you have a new respect for me and mine now. I was just telling a story the way it happened. It wasn’t about politics, it was about pussy - something you have probably read about. But no hard feelings - I hope you and your family interface well over the Holiday Season. Perhaps y’all can get some quality time in the Volvo, and you and the Missus can schedule a caring orgasm while your yuppie larvae are at their flute lessons. Me? Before you read this, I’m plannin’ to get a piece of ass while the rugrats are watching Adult Swim.

C’ya