Poof!

OK, last week I pointed out that OJ, Britney, K-Fed, etc. were all assholes, morons, buttworms, or all of the above. We had OJ releasing his book and doing interviews, Fed-Ex was about to treat us to an “inside” interview with Britney’s pussy, and, and the Democrats were claiming to have spines. Poof. OJ can’t even get Kinko’s to make copies of his book, his interview was cancelled, and Fed-Excrement said JK on the sex tape. A flakier group of fucknuts would be hard to find.

Poll Position

And the Democrats, after winning the House, Senate, and a trip to Disneyland, have gone back to their usual sniveling, whining, bitching, and finger-pointing. Ever have sex with a Democrat? You can’t. It is almost impossible to have sex with someone when they won’t pick a position. I had sex with a Democrat chick back in school once. Well, sort of. After flip-flopping around the bed for an hour trying to get her to agree on, and stick to, a position, I told her I would settle for some head. She agreed, but said it would only be fair and democratic if she also gave head to a Latino, a Black, a Jew, and a physically challenged person. So, being in a Blue State at the time (as was my dick), she made a call to a friend at the Democratic National Committee and he sent over some “voters”. After choking on the Black guy, making me pay the Jew for the three minutes he was there, failing to wake up the Latino, and sucking sweet Timmy right up out of his wheel chair (he can walk now), she told them to help themselves in the fridge, and asked me to give them bus fare home. I am a patient man. Finally, with everybody gone, I turned to my sweet thing, ignoring the 31 Baskin-Robbins samples dribbling down her chin and said something like “How ’bout it”? It was at that point that she started making weird faces, rubbing her jaw, and moving her chin funny. The last thing I remember, she was saying something about repetitive stress injury and asking me if I had an attorney. I couldn’t help but respond at this point. Anyway, I am out again and only have eleven more years of probation, and I think her family understands. Damn Democrats.

If you are offended by the above post or think that it was aimed at you personally, it wasn’t. If you were hit by a meteor and vaporized as you read this, I seriously doubt anyone would notice. It isn’t about you. Amp does not single out any race, creed, sex, nationality, ethnicity, profession, orientation, religion, or political affiliation. Amp is an equal opportunity offender. At some level, we are all equally fucked.

C’ya